When back pain occurs, it truly does affect virtually every aspect of your life. It can potentially change everything. For those of you who are familiar with my work, and my emphasis on your partner or spouse as a resource for healing, you know that I feel it is particularly important for back pain sufferers to be able to get back in touch with as much of their life before back pain as possible. One of the worst things that can happen when back or neck pain becomes a (temporary) part of your life is to abandon sexual intimacy, and all of the positive benefits that come with it.
Sex can have numerous benefits for pain sufferers;
-An endorphin release, which acts as a natural pain reliever.
-The slow mobilization of the segments of the lower back, sacrum and pelvis.
-The pleasure of intimate touch, and relief from the feelings of alienation which can sometimes accompany pain.
-The restoration of normalcy in a life which may have been drastically compromised by back & neck pain.
I did a post on this a little while back, and received many emails and messages about how couples found more comfortable ways to have sex- and it was really interesting (and sometimes entertaining really) to hear how people were able to reintroduce sexual activity into their lives. You can tell by the lengths some folks went to, to see how much of a priority this was for them. More than a few of my viewers have swings installed their bedrooms- an elegant- if complicated solution.
I was contacted by a website, sensuouswife.com about some of the products they sell to help couples achieve comfortable sex. Their site is very interesting, and it is couples-friendly (ie: there are no threatening images of impossibly thin or chiseled models to make either of you feel inadequate.) Their product line is clearly aimed at heterosexual couples, but the products I described below could offer benefits to pretty much anyone. I have attached a few images from their site (with their permission of course) and some descriptions. The company provided some descriptions as well which are included under the images:
Wedge-ramp combination.
The Ramp/Wedge combo (or the individual Wedge and Ramp, for those who don’t want to buy both at once) is probably the best starting place for couples working to make sex less painful. They give excellent support in a number of configurations, and they are designed to change the height or angle to make penetration easier and more comfortable. Sex is much less strenuous for both partners – the person lying on the shapes has much better support, and the person on top usually finds that they can get things lined up without supporting himself or herself in odd positions or angles. The angling also bring the couple closer together, so that they can look into each others’ eyes and talk to each other without straining.
The Esse
The Esse.
The Esse is also designed to give support in a variety of positions, allowing both spouses to relax and enjoy each other. Most users find that the support allows the spine to curve naturally and comfortably. The Esse also has the advantage of being narrow enough to straddle, which many couples find is easier on the hips and knees, since the legs can be used efficiently and naturally.
The Whirl.
The Whirl is less well-known, but many people find it very helpful, especially if they are dealing with hip or knee pain, since it can support the movement of thrusting by rolling back and forth.
Each of these products are covered in a velvet-like microfiber fabric, which is very soft and comfortable, but also “grips” other fabrics. So unlike most pillows, the Liberator Shapes won’t slide around on the bed during use. This also means that if a couple wants to customize the support by adding another pillow or two (for example, some people find the Ramp more comfortable if they have a pillow behind their head) the pillow will stay put on the shape and not slip around.
In looking over the products, they seem to offer some simple solutions to some ergonomic issues sexually active partners can encounter when trying to find comfortable ways to have sex. The two most useful from a low back pain standpoint would be the Whirl, and the Esse- which has the added benefit of offering neck support for neck pain sufferers. I really like these products- give them a look.
For those looking for more information on sex and back pain, I have posted on this before, but there is also an excellent book available entitled The Joy of Comfortable Sex by Pierre Angier, D.O. (available on Amazon)
I am so happy that there are people and companies out there which are addressing this problem. Sex is way to important to give up. Bringing sexual intimacy back to a relationship which may have even be ravaged by back and neck pain can really help to get things back on track, and help further your quest to get back pain out of your life.
Thanks for visiting, and be well,
-Andy
